Speaking Up: Growing in Confidence with AAC

 

The more we use something, the more comfortable and confident we become using it. Even though I have been using my AAC device for years and I like to talk a lot, I used to be shy and quiet when talking to strangers or people I had just met. Over the years, though, I have become much more comfortable talking to people I don't know.

 

For example, when I got a new support worker, I used to be quiet and shy about talking to them. I would let my mum and my other support worker explain everything to them, but now I feel much more comfortable talking to them myself.

 

Another example happened just a few weeks ago when there was a new helper at Guides. In the past, I would have been scared to talk to them, but that night I was talking away and even asked them for help. It made me realise how much my confidence has grown.

 

When I am with my mum, I can sometimes sit back and let her do the talking for me. I think that's just a mum thing! But I have also started speaking up for myself more when I am with her.

 

There wasn't one particular moment when I suddenly became more confident. It happened gradually, and over time I started to notice a difference in myself. During my journalism course, I became more confident about speaking up and asking for help when I needed it.

 

I noticed it again when I went to my first Clydesider magazine meeting. I was speaking for myself and joining in with the conversation. More recently, at the Cerebral Palsy Scotland conference, I went around the different stands and spoke to people myself. At the Motability stand, I simply went up and asked them a question. That might sound like a small thing, but it was something I might have been too shy to do before.

 

I felt great afterwards because I was putting myself out there and speaking up for myself. Sometimes I forget that I can actually teach people how to understand me and how I communicate. If someone hasn't met me before, they might not know straight away how to communicate with me, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't start the conversation.

There are different ways I help people understand how I communicate. For example, I have a button on my talker that says: “This is my communication device. I use it to help me talk, so talk to me as normal and please give me time to get what I want to say together.”

 

I use a tracker dot to access the program on my device, and the dot is on my head. Sometimes, though, I don't explain anything at all. I just start talking and let the person see for themselves that they can have a normal conversation with me.

 

Becoming more confident talking to strangers has helped me realise that I can speak up for myself and communicate just like anyone else.

 

I was very keen to find out how confident people who communicate differently feel about speaking up and talking to strangers, so I decided to ask a few friends about their experiences.

My friend Marion is an AAC user who uses a communication device and a communication board. Unlike me, Marion has always felt confident and comfortable talking to strangers. As Marion explained, “At the end of the day my talker is my voice.”

Marion also worked as a volunteer advocacy worker, helping people who had problems with housing or care services. She explained, “I think being an Advocacy worker helped me to become more confident in larger settings.”

My second friend, Malaika, communicates differently from both Marion and me, as she is Deaf.

She uses a hearing aid and communicates through lipreading and British Sign Language (BSL).

From a young age, Malaika’s parents were strong advocates for her, making sure that her teachers and other pupils understood her communication needs. Malaika explained that when she was younger, she would avoid talking on the telephone and going to noisy places, such as parties. However, things became more difficult when she was in her mid-twenties.

She explained, “the remaining hearing I had in my left ear was lost virtually overnight and was a massive shock and grief. I became less confident in social settings and with new people and it probably took about 3 years before I accepted this was the new ‘normal’.”

Learning British Sign Language (BSL) was a big turning point for Malaika.  She explained, “I have become more confident and joined another community of people with similar deafness to my own.”

Like me, Malaika teaches people the best way to communicate with her, from asking people to stand face to face with her to making sure the lighting is right.

Malaika feels strongly that “communication is a 2/way conversation and it’s up to the other person to meet you halfway.”

My advice to people who communicate differently would be to remember that, as Malaika said, communication is a two-way conversation. You can also be the teacher.

If you want to be involved in conversations, don't be afraid to speak up for yourself and teach people how best to communicate with you. Show them that they can have a normal conversation with you, just like anyone else.

Most importantly, don't be scared to communicate in your own way. Be confident and believe in yourself.

 

 Written by Jill